My Doosts! Aloha.

Welcome to this edition of my NYC street style post, a.k.a. a space where I upload images and quotes of people I encounter who make me go ↓

daaaang, something fabulous is going on with this person.

These posts are not about specific style parameters, rather they are about a vibe. Does this person look awesome? Is there a good chance they’ll talk to me for a few minutes? When all goes well, pictures are taken and then I ask them for their thoughts on self-love and self-care.

This month I’ll include myself. My questions were harder to answer than I thought.

Enjoy the wisdom and images from these awesome women featured below. Huge thanks to each of you for sharing your thoughts. I hope this post grants some posterity to what was a glorious and fleeting NYC spring.

meet Jacqueline

I love my hair, I’ve always loved my hair. And I think in general,  with age, I’ve learned to love my body as it is, right now, and how to take care of it and understand my body is a manifestation of me taking care of it, putting good things into it.

If you’re having a bad day it’s gonna affect other people, and you’re just putting it out into the world so you have to center yourself.

… truth … her solution:

I’ll take a few minutes and take a few deep belly breaths, center myself.

When I feel my absolute best or I feel the most myself is when I can look back like on a day and think like, that was really well spent. Or that was exactly what I wanted to do.

♥

meet Kaley

I have managed to learn a lot of really great coping skills over the years …

“I kind of resort back to things I did when I was younger that I know made me really happy. Mostly including watching movies that I like, making it a point to reach out and get out and surround myself with people who I know are positive and make me feel good. I think that’s most important, instead of wallowing uh—alone.

I think I really enjoy just reflecting on past memories and– you know when you’re young there’s a lot of things that you do that—you’re kind of just happy no matter what? So I try to put myself in that mindset where I’m in that single moment and nothing else sort of exists.

I started doing this years ago, when I really needed it. You know—when you’re a teenager and you kind of—or for myself at least—just kind of always brought myself down, but I learned to bring myself up instead. It’s hard to put into words.”

♥

meet Victoria

Ahhh I love – (laughs) that’s a hard one. I love my face. I did not always love my face, but I love my big Lebanese features now …

I grew up in Texas where most people were white and had very Aryan profiles and features, but my eyes were really big and my nose was really big and it was rounded down instead of sloping upward and my cheeks were big and I just thought everything was too much. I thought my face was too much, too big, too many things. And now I love it, cause it’s expressive and I think it is beautiful and it’s different, and I love that about it.”

I wish people talked more about bodies and what they like naturally do, do you know?

… Women grow hair on their bodies, and that’s super normal. And periods, that is also very natural and not a gross thing, it’s a really beautiful thing because it means we can create life. And you know what, we sweat.

… I’ve stopped using antiperspirant for the past year, I just use natural deodorant. I use one called Kiss My Face, it’s their Lavender scent one. It’s just a crystal that’s supposed to neutralize the odor of your sweat, but it doesn’t stop you from sweating at all, cause we sweat! That is a very natural and human and HEALTHFUL thing that our bodies do! And I started being like, yeah, this is the way I smell, this is the way my body smells and that’s ok. And if you’re attracted to it, great, and if you’re not, then –I mean I’m not offensively smelly but I want to smell like me—and with boobs too! We  make them shaped a certain way with bras that –this is a really long answer—that make our boobs like these perfect round globes and that’s not what boobs look like.”

♥

meet Vivian 

I never settle. I never settle. I’ve been told I never settle. And it’s both a blessing and a curse.

… Because on the one hand never settling means you find yourself in really awesome situations. But sometimes when you never settle you spend so much time sometime not being in the moment because you’re looking for the next thing or the next level.”

“When I’m having a bad day, I need to get out in the world. I need to not isolate myself in my apartment. And one of the places I love to go to if I’m having that kind of a time is one of the farmers markets around the city. Just sort of moving through herbs and produce and flowers, I find it super restorative.”

♥

meet Jules and Ilana

Everyone has days where they are down on themselves, whether physically or mentally. Which tactics help you out of these funks and into a more positive mindset?

JULES: When I’m feeling down I hang out with my plants and my room mate Leanne and then I feel allllll right. A happy home is key.

Please describe a scenario where you feel your absolute best.

JULES: Brooklyn Summer.

ILANA: Performing with my band PEP. And when I walk Adele home (the 9 year old I nanny), and she tells me every detail of her day.

What do you love most about your body?

JULES: The fact that it’s alive and healthy.

ILANA: I love that my body is resilient and has a strong base. Even when I am out of shape, I know that I will be able to build back strength. It is also very nice for putting up with me eating millions of grilled cheese sandwiches in my lifetime.

What do you love most about yourself?

JULES: That I can move my body and be free.

ILANA: My emotional intelligence and my patience.

What’s the last thing that made you laugh?  

JULE: The last interaction I had. I live to lol.

ILANA: A gif of Fabio’s hair blowing in the wind. Well, really the act of sending said gif over text to someone at the perfect moment  – so actually I am the last thing that made me laugh.

Piper (yrs truly)

I love that I have the capacity to change and grow.

This is why I love getting older. With every year–every day, sometimes–I become more self-aware, which makes me like myself more, and it makes me more enjoyable to be around.

… I went through a weird time in my early twenties (specifically 22 and 24) when I had the most miserable birthdays. My unwarranted despair had nothing to do with what was happening around me, but with myself. I was dissatisfied with what I had not yet accomplished, and I felt so alone, because I didn’t understand my sadness, and couldn’t appreciate all the good people and things around me. Now that I’m in the latter half of my twenties, I’m learning to be grateful for–damn, too many things. Life isn’t fair and I’ve been so lucky in so many ways.

I had my first refusal (from a potential street-styler) the other day. It was 8am (this did not help) when I passed by this beautiful woman in a black and white patterned maxi dress, a light-colored scarf tossed over one shoulder, black sneakers, and cute glasses that looked like Mindy Kaling’s pair from season 2 of The Mindy Project. 

Approaching strangers is something I’m still getting used to, so at first I kept walking. Then I thought, “you’ll regret not asking,” so I stopped mid-sidewalk and promptly looked at my phone, because that’s my go-to when I feel uncomfortable. I looked back at her again, she looked at me suspiciously, I looked back at my phone. Then I gathered some chutzpah and went up to her.

Her reasons for refusal were that she didn’t think she looked good that day. When I assured her that she did she reconsidered, but after telling her I would also ask her about self-love and self-care, she guffawed and said this definitely wasn’t going to work out.

Who knows the reason for her derision, but I assume it was because she was not feeling full of self-love that morning. I wish I’d said, “look, it’s been a shitty week with what happened in Orlando last week, and the general divisiveness and lack of empathy and communication in this country, and I have no idea what is going on with you, but I know you’re doing the best you can. I’m interested in what works for you.” But that would have been pushy and presumptuous so I left her alone. But I told her to email me next time she’s wearing an outfit in which she’s feeling herself. She probz won’t but—we’ll see!

♥